I'm praying for you!

:)

Pope Francis on the priesthood:

In this year’s Chrism Mass homily, the pope says that even in the most banal neediness, people show forth the deep desire to “be anointed.” The priest must not wait, but go out, because “the power of grace comes alive and flourishes to the extent that we, in faith, go out and give ourselves and the gospel to others.” This is the challenge of the parish priest: to live internally in conformity to Christ, but to live this in the world, in his community. This call to “nothingness” as a call to total service is not a loss of self; it is not a denial of personal gifts, desires, or well-being.

You can read more here.

I'm praying for you!

:)

Speaking of Lourdes, don't know if I told you this, but they have an entire gigantic building completely devoted to confession!

You just walk in and wander down the hall until you find a priest who speaks the same language as you (they're in little rooms with their names and languages on the doors and there are pews lining the hallway between all the rooms.

So, your life goal (before becoming pope) should be to be one of the priests who just spends all his time sitting in a room at Lourdes hearing confessions.

I'm praying for you!

:)

So you know what's really strange about humans?

Most of the unnecessary grudges we hold our against ourselves.

We remember every embarrassing, stupid, mean, or awful thing we've ever done.

We replay these things in our heads.

"That was a long time ago."

"Nobody remembers it but you."

"You already confessed that, my child. Let it go."

And still, we sit there, thinking about how awful we are, when in reality, everybody else on the planet has messed up just as badly as us.

A priest at Lourdes told me, "Stop beating yourself up. You're doing the best you can."

And at first I was like, "How can you say that? I'm not always my best, and neither is anyone else."

But if you're in confession, you are doing the best you can. We are small and weak. We have no means of repairing the damage of our sins on our own, or of repaying God. If we've made amends with people we've hurt and confessed our sins to a priest, then we've literally done the best we could possibly do in that situation.

And we need to stop beating ourselves up for things that are already forgiven.

I'm praying for you!

:)

So, this one line from Psalm 147 really struck me during morning prayer today:

The Lord delights in those who revere him, in those who wait for his love.

I don't really know why that line stuck out to me so much, but it seemed like a good line for contemplation, so I thought I'd share.

I'm praying for you!

:)

A Prayer For My Friend
Author Unknown

Lord, I ask You to bless my friend who is reading this right now.

Where there is pain,
may they find peace and mercy.

Where there is self-doubt,
may they gain a renewed confidence.

Where there is weariness or exhaustion,
give them understanding, patience, and strength.

Where there is fear,
reveal your love, and offer to them your courage.

Give them greater vision, bless their finances,
and raise up leaders and friends to support and encourage them.

May their spirit always be joyous and
their days rich and full with love and happiness,

And may they always know that they have a friend.

I'm praying for you!

:)

Prayer for Seminarians (from the archdiocese of Omaha):

Lord Jesus, I ask your special blessing on all young men preparing for the
priesthood in our seminaries. I pray that they will grow in faith, hope, and
charity. May their hearts overflow with your compassion, understanding, and
generosity, and may their desire to serve you inspire others to answer your
call. Lord, give our seminarians the grace to follow you more perfectly. When
they are lonely or discouraged, fill them with your peace. Jesus meek and
humble of heart, make the hearts of our seminarians like yours. Amen.

I'm praying for you!

:)

Prayed a rosary for you yesterday :)

If you have any specific prayer requests, let me know.

I'm praying for you!

:)

So currently my mom is freaking out because I´m "alone" in Barcelona, but I´m really not alone.

I don´t understand why we even have the word alone. It´s literally impossible for any living person to be alone, for God is everywhere. So wherever I am, God is there, too. Plus I´ve got my guardian angel(s) (my mom says I need more than one) and then there´s Mary and all the saints who are watching out for me.

And it´s not like I´m special. The same is true for anyone. So why do we say we´re alone? And why when somebody says "but God´s here" does it usually get shrugged off as a "yeah, religious technicality, whatever." We treat God´s presence as something that´s technically true, but which doesn´t really affect us - we´re alone, because God somehow doesn´t count.

But that´s absurd. If anyone´s presence matters, it´s God´s. So, no, I am not in Barcelona alone. I have never been alone in my entire life, and I never will be, not even for a second. I am in Barcelona with God and my guardian angel, and they´re really awesome company.

I´m praying for you!

:)

I'm praying for you!

:)

So, Wednesday I forgot.

And yesterday I didn't have internet access.

Because my hostel in Barcelona is stupid.

Because I'm incompetent with computers.

But I'm praying for you still.

And I hope you are having a wonderful week,

Despite everything happening with bombs and such.

And I don't know why I'm writing this like a poem

When it's really just a paragraph, but oh well.

I'm praying for you!

:)

Do you ever just stop and think:

God didn't have to create humans, but He chose to do so anyway.

There are an infinite number of ways God could have designed humans.

Out of the way God chose to design humans, there are still a nearly infinite number of ways an individual's genome could be constructed.

There are an infinite number of ways God could have made you, physically, emotionally, mentally.

And He knew that. He saw all the possible beings He could create, and He chose to make you. 

So if you ever wish you were different or wonder if you're not enough for whatever you're called to do, remember that God could have made you any way He wanted, and He chose to make you the way you are.

I'm praying for you!

:)

I would try to write something really meaningful, but Marc Barnes has beaten me to the punch and you should really just go read Bad Catholic.

I guess that's a stupid thing to write on a blog, though: Go read another blog.

So, um, here's some more religious poetry. I wrote this in high school:

The Painter’s Brush

Colors, dancing, twirling, coming alive

Cascading down, filling the world

With their beauty; vibrant hues

Mixing together, melting into one.

The scent of the painter’s easel

As he moves his brush

Scattering pigments onto the leaves

Filling the air with colored light.

This scent overwhelms me

Takes away my breath,

Makes me want to be

A part of the painting

To jump into the midst of the chaos

To be suffocated by the colors,

By the shades of orange and gold

Dancing around and in me

Moving me to feel,

To long to dance with them,

To have myself transformed,

Painted, remade, by the same brush.

I'm praying for you!

:)

I feel like I need to come back from whatever crazy place I've been the last couple days and appear to be normal instead of writing long rambly posts about bread and apple trees.

Um, I don't really know how to be normal.

Here's a poem I wrote about Easter. It was inspired by the taste of a cocktail in Paris.

The Eternal Ache

Sadness turns to joy

So quickly

Emotions exploding

Joy like a phoenix

From the ashes of pain

3 days in the grand scheme

Of things is as a breath

It comes and goes

Like a sigh

And yet, the joy

Remains

In 3 days

The pain has vanished

Replaced with joy

With a swelling of the heart

And of the soul

So intense, so strong

That nothing can quell it

And yet, the pain

Was always so strong

It seemed eternal

It was eternal

A permanent ache

A thorn in the side

Of all of creation

A thorn in the side

Replaced by

A thorn in the head

A crown so heavy

Only one could wear it

Only one could bear it

The eternal ache

Removed by a lance

Time and eternity

Blended together

The pain and the joy

Bursting forth together

As the thorn was freed

From the side, As the

Crown was placed on

The head, the universe

Choked and groaned

For 3 days, as

Eternity ripped open

Time ripped apart

And eternity entered

Time, time entered

Eternity. Wouldn´t

It be better, easier

If time could have

Had more of itself

If eternity could have

Had enough time

To converge without

Collapsing, without

Groaning, but still

As three days are

A sigh, a breath

All of time is as

A dream, passing

In the blink of an

Eye, forgotten when

We awake, so no

Time could have been

Enough for the eternal clash

Of joy and pain, pain

And joy, mingling, and

All was suspended, as

Nothing could exist

And nothing could cease

In the catching of a

Breath, the eternal ache

Left time’s side, entered

The head of the eternal

One, and the joy burst

Forth, all-consuming

And time forgot the ache

For time forgot time

And eternity began

Although it had never ceased.


I'm praying for you!

:)

My real question is why on Earth would God make that stupid tree in the first place?

I mean, why even have something that's forbidden?

It's not like it appeared out of nowhere.

Tree - "Hello, I'm the evil tree that sprouted without permission."

Adam and Eve: "What's evil? That looks yummy."
God - "No! Don't eat that!"

That obviously didn't happen. God purposefully made a tree (I mean, we can go non-literal and say that God created something else that led them to temptation, but the thinking is simpler if we stick to the probably metaphorical story of the garden, which is probably why we have the metaphor in the first place, actually).

God purposefully made a tree with purposefully forbidden fruit. In a way, He created the temptation, when He could have just not created anything tempting. He knew what would happen, so He could have just said, "I won't create that tree."

But I think the point is that the possibility to sin had to exist.

Because if we didn't have the ability to choose anything other than love of God, if there literally was no other option, than free will wouldn't really exist.

God - "You are free. You can eat from whatever tree you want."

Adam and Eve - "Dude, there's only one tree in all of existence."

God - "You can freely choose to eat from that tree."

Adam and Eve - "You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means."

Giving us the ability to choose sin, giving us something which we were not supposed to choose, gave us the ability to choose between God and sin. It gave us the ability to choose to love God. He truly gave us freedom, and we could have chosen Him. We really could have.

But we didn't. We chose the stupid tree. Really, that whole story makes me wonder if we weren't somewhat flawed beings before the fall, because seriously, two perfect humans looked at a stupid piece of fruit and were like, "Yup, this is worth giving up paradise. It looks delicious."

Anyway, we chose the tree and the fruit. And God wasn't surprised, although Genesis makes Him look kinda surprised. (And Adam and Eve aren't really the brightest people at the moment either - seriously, you think you can hide from Him?!) He knew we would choose the fruit. And He made it anyway. Because even though He knew we would throw His gift of love and life and freedom back in His face, He still loved us and gave us our freedom anyway.

Also, on a slightly related topic, what's really mind-blowing to me is that there was never a specific moment in time when God made His will. I mean, He's existed always. And it's not like He'd been spending eternity just chillaxing and not thinking about humans and then suddenly He was like, "I'm bored. I'll make a universe, and some people. People would be fun." And He didn't sit there for a while thinking through everything we would do and coming up with the perfect response.

His will has always existed. He has always known everything that would ever happen. Always. His will never began, just as He never began.

So His will is not some series of rationalizations and logical equations that He thought up one day.

His will has to be one with Him.

I really don't understand this, because it's much easier to imagine God thinking through every event and coming up with a response than to think of Him as a being who by His very nature has always had a perfect plan and the perfect response to every problem.

I'm praying for you!

:)

So today, I had a really weird experience where I spent like 15 minutes staring at a piece of bread and wondering why Jesus chose bread for the Eucharist. I really don't know, but I couldn't stop thinking about it. If you have any clues, let me know.

I'm praying for you!

:)

Accidental Pilgrimage

Jake Schirra and I went on an accidental pilgrimage. We meant to travel around Italy and France for a couple weeks, just seeing the sights. Yes, we planned on visiting the Vatican and spending a day in Lourdes, but beyond that, spring break was just supposed to be a normal secular vacation.

If you want to make God laugh...

First of all, no matter what other plans we tried to make, we ended up wandering into churches.

We kept finding Mass or Eucharistic Adoration going on in these churches, sometimes multiple times in one day.


In Rome, I ended up spending a lot of time talking to Mary and experienced at least one miracle per day.

In Florence, we got lost on the buses and ended up spending the rest of the time talking about God and vocations.

And in Lourdes, well, that was an adventure. We missed our train, and God made us a new train. I swear that the train we took to Lourdes did not exist in any records the night before.

And in Lourdes, I can't even really explain what happened. We both got strong vocation calls, and Jesus and Mary started talking to me (not audibly, but there are now thoughts in my head at times that I know aren't my own).

We witnessed very real spiritual warfare, as the devil tried every which way to keep us from continuing our journey.

And finally, during Mass at Sacre Couer in Paris, I was doubting Jesus' voice in my head the last couple days. He told me to look up and open my eyes, and my eyes came to rest on a blank space above the altar with a white sheet, where I assumed a statue was supposed to be. I thought, "Great, I've just been imagining everything. There's nothing there." Jesus responded "I'm here." and I strained my eyes trying to see some sort of vision, to which He replied, "I am not a ghost. If you see me, I will not fade in, I will be real." I sat there for a few moments, thinking that I was imagining everything, when suddenly, the sheet began to rise (because the priest was raising it), revealing a giant monstrance with the exposed host. Jesus had been there all along!

Anyway, that is my bizarre-sounding story of how I can now hear Jesus and Mary talking to me in my head sometimes.

I'm praying for you!

:)

“If we have good desires or good instructions, and we have not sufficient strength to put them into practice, let us offer them to Him and He will make us capable of accomplishing them. If we put our confidence in His goodness, He will renew these desires as often as will be necessary to make us persevere in His service.”

—	Saint Francis de Sales

I'm praying for you!

:)

“EVERYTHING IN THE MASS IS SIGNIFICANT! Everything! The genuflecting, the sitting, the standing, the elevation of the sacred vessels, EVERYTHING! A priest didn’t just go to his friend and say, ‘Hmm. How can we make Mass more interesting?’ and get the reply, ‘Oh, I know! We should pick stuff up!’”

— Mark Hart




I'm praying for you!

:)

I'm really tempted to say that marriage is the most difficult vocation to discern, because you can't do it by yourself. You have to discern with someone else.

But then I realized, you have to do that with every vocation. It's easier to recognize it in marriage, but every vocation is about a relationship. You and the Church. You and God.

So you can't figure out your vocation on your own. You can't just shut yourself off from God and the world and find some magical perfect fit path for your life all by yourself.

Discernment is a process of developing a relationship, and you can't do that by yourself.

I'm praying for you!

:)

“Sin then is, as we have said, a fearful evil, but not incurable; fearful for him who clings to it, but easy of cure for him who by repentance puts it from him. For suppose that a man is holding fire in his hand; as long as he holds fast the live coal he is sure to be burned, but should he put away the coal, he would have cast away the flame also with it. If however anyone thinks that he is not being burned when sinning, to him the Scripture says, ‘Can a man take fire to his bosom, and his garments not burned?’ (Prv 6:27). For sin burns the sinews of the soul, and breaks the spiritual bones of the mind, and darkens the light of the heart.”

—	St. Cyril of Jerusalem, in his meditations “On Repentance”

I'm praying for you!

:)

"In our society we used to speak of the oppressors and the oppressed. As time passed, we realised that this framework was inadequate and we had to add another, those who are included and those who are excluded. Today things have become much worse and we need to add another framework: those who are needed and those who aren’t. In a culture driven by consumerism, hedonism and narcissism, we have become used to looking upon people as useless….
God must love old age a lot because someone who treats his parents respectfully is heaped with blessings. At 74, I am about to enter old age and I’m not reluctant. I am getting ready for it and I want to be vintage wine, not sour wine. The bitterness of an old man is the worst of all, because it is beyond the point of no return. An old man is called to peace, to tranquillity. I ask this grace for myself." - Cardinal Jorge Bergoglio

I'm praying for you!

:)

Quotes about the Eucharist

The angels surround and help the priest when he is celebrating Mass. ~ St. Augustine

I'm praying for you!

:)

Quotes about the Eucharist

It would be easier for the world to survive without the sun than to do without Holy Mass. ~ St. Pio of Pietrelcina

I'm praying for you!

:)

Quotes about the Eucharist

When we have been to Holy Communion, the balm of love envelops the soul as the flower envelops the bee. ~ Saint Jean Vianney

I'm praying for you!

:)

Quotes about the Eucharist

There is nothing so great as the Eucharist. If God had something more precious, He would have given it to us. ~ Saint Jean Vianney

I'm praying for you!

:)